A cake with candles? Awesome!

And people who sing happy birthday? Fabulous!

But a garden? A birthday garden?

This was a new idea for me and was a gift from a trusted resource to mark my own recent birthday.

Our reflections of where we are now, and where we want to be in the future, often exist just in those few seconds it takes to catch a deep breath to blow out those candles on the cake.

The Birthday Garden is a tool developed by Julia Poernbacher, M.Sc., which is a metaphor she uses to reflect on the past year, celebrating personal growth, and to set intentions for the future.

Here’s a summary of the steps:

Look at your garden

With closed eyes, take a few deep breaths, and visualize your unique garden space:

What does it look like? Is it thriving or does it need care?

What’s growing? The flowers and plants represent your successes, joys, and potentials

How about weeds? They represent your challenges, habits, and things that no longer serve you.

Are there areas that need more attention or feel neglected?

Celebrate the harvest

The ‘fruits’ of your harvest are your successes, the moments of fulfillment through experiences and relationships of the last year.

Identify three significant successes or joyful experiences.

Reflect on what helped those successes bloom: what actions, people, or circumstances played a part?

Reflect on what those successes taught you and how they made you feel.

Pull the weeds

Maintenance is a part of every garden’s upkeep. Consider the habits, limiting beliefs, people, or challenges that may have held back your growth, no longer serving you.

Reflect on three things you are ready to release that have held back your growth. Perhaps, create a releasing ritual to help you let go of them. Consider writing them down on papers and holding each one close to your chest as you reflect on how it has affected you. Acknowledge its role in your life and how it made you feel. Then, with a deep breath in and out, set that paper down away from you.

Plant new seeds

Choose what you want to plant in your garden for the new year ahead.

What personal qualities do you want to develop, and what are the exact steps you will take to nurture them?

Reflect on three goals, qualities, or intentions for your garden, aligning your ‘seed’ with your action steps to keep it alive.

Tending your garden

As you create a plan for success, consider how you will maintain your garden through the coming year, asking yourself:

What goal am I growing? What habits will help me? How will I stay accountable? Who or what can support my efforts? How will I know that I have succeeded?

A vision statement

Write one that summarizes your over-arching goals and keep it somewhere you can see a reminder.

For example: “This year, I nurture a more-balanced approach to my efforts and interests. Being mindful that change takes time, I will celebrate the small victories all year long!”

In health –

Deidre

It’s 100% live! Toolkit for Caregiver Emotions is now available both in print and as an eBook! Pre-orders have been delivered today by Amazon! Get yours today HERE.

This has been a flower in my garden that has taken extra love, attention, and time for it to blossom! Please share this helpful resource with caregivers you know. The emotional tangle family caregivers experience is often the last topic to be addressed when, in fact, it should be top of the list!

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