All posts by Deidre

A child of Colorado, Delaware, Oregon, and California – where she obtained her first college degree and became a Nursing Home Administrator – Deidre Edwards now resides in North Carolina. While helping her husband start a video production business and raising their two children, Deidre returned to college to earn her nursing degree. A teacher at heart, she soon applied her nursing skills and knowledge to helping high school students expand their medical career interests through the Health Science Program she established. After retiring from teaching, Deidre wrote her first book – Toolkit for Wellness – as a response to the health issues she witnessed while working. She witnessed both students and staff had struggling with excess weight, diabetes, poor food choices, and stress issues – yet everyone shared the desire for a healthier life. Her easy-to-understand explanations of body functions and how foods break down, clearly show her passion for teaching others. Deidre’s dual passion in learning about habits and habit formation is expressed in her books and regular blog writings so others can learn how to make big improvements through daily small changes. Life took a dramatic turn when Deidre’s husband became confined to bed under Hospice care at home for over two years. With all of her nursing skills on board, and a deep love between them to sweeten the moments, she provided the loving, quality-of-life care he needed. Still the teacher at heart, Deidre realized there was a huge need to light the way for others as they walked the path of caregiving for a loved one. Hence, she wrote Toolkit for Caregivers and Love Lives Here, Toolkit for Caregiver Survival. Together, both books address the caregiving processes, skills, and issues for before, during, and afterward. Deidre continues to be involved with her community through choral singing groups, volunteering for the North Carolina Symphony, Chamber of Commerce, church functions, and activities with friends and family. She also enjoys the time she spends promoting her books and speaking with others about health and caregiving.
Blogging for good health!

Strings

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People talk about all kinds of strings.

  • String theory.
  • Beware of any strings that may be attached to what seems to be a good deal.
  • Zing went the strings of my heart! Note: There really are strings in the heart called chordae tendineae.

And then, we speak of pulling strings …

… to get something by calling in favors from influential contacts.

… on a sweater … not a good idea if you want to keep your sweater from unraveling!

Then, there’s that invisible string that we all need to pull every morning.

I learned about this string when taking a creative movement/dance class in high school. Our instructor reminded us to pull that invisible string at the very top of our head to assist us in standing up straighter, lifting our chins, aligning our shoulders, and raising our chests up high.

Little secret: Going through the physical motions of ‘pulling’ on this invisible string helps.

There is power in body language – not only as how others perceive us, but also as how our body language is the reflection of how we view ourselves.

“The mind believes what we tell it.” Ex: I can do this!

Our body language can tell us a great deal as well.

Having a hard day? Not feeling great?

Are you in what I call “the trudge”? – you know, varying degrees of slumping, being bent over, shoulders rounded.

PULL THAT STRING!

The trudge sucks power and energy out of us! Listen to Amy Cuddy’s TED talk for an inspirational review on how our body language can change the very hormonal chemistry of our blood. See below:

If you want to give energy, you must be an open vessel to receive it. Confident people are confident because they have the body language of confidence.

Fake it until you make it? Absolutely! If that’s where you are starting from, do it!

Confidence will not replace preparation, but many well-prepared people lack confidence – possibly because of imposter syndrome, whereby they feel like unqualified fakes.

Whatever life has in store for you, ‘pull that string’ to bring your best self to the new day.

Then, take two full minutes in your power pose! Two minutes. It takes that long to reset hormone levels.

I did this once as a body reset while in Denver International Airport. We were waiting for a connecting flight back home and I was starting to slump with feelings of coming down with something.

Off to the restroom I went where, in the privacy of my stall, I pulled my invisible string and struck the power pose for two minutes.

My last flight home was comfortable.

“The mind believes what we tell it.”

“My mind believes what I tell it – and show it!”

In health –

Deidre

Blogging for good health!, Recipes, This -n- That, Titles Worth Reading

Fake Fall to Real Deal

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We had what the meteorologists in our area were calling ‘fake fall’ over a week ago. Noticeably cooler in the mornings, with drier air and lower temperatures. Ahhh.

After the serious summer heat earlier in August, we were ready. But only so much.

I did not want to hop from sundresses to fall sweaters the last of August! And forget about all things pumpkin … no, not yet! I’m just not ready for those favorites.

But here we are. It’s the third of September – universities, colleges, and most of the schools are back in session. If you look attentively, there is a slight up-tick in color in the trees and the number of leaves on the ground is growing.

Are you like me? Long removed from attending or working at a school, this still feels like a new beginning. Time to chart my course, at least for the coming months.

Part of me wants a new, sharp number 2 yellow pencil and a stack of college-lined paper!

After watching my son prepare a batch of chimichurri recently, I have become a fan of this versatile condiment which seems to go with everything. The fact that every ingredient is healthy is even better!

A sauce of Argentine origin, chimichurri is excellent on grilled meats – and if you are lucky -enough to have some leftover sauce. It goes on everything, including eggs.

Chimichurri is a simple mixture of garlic, parsley, oregano, red wine vinegar, extra virgin olive oil, and salt/pepper/crushed red pepper. This is the recipe I followed:

Chimichurri

4 cloves garlic minced

2 cups flat-leaf parsley, finely chopped

1/2 cup fresh oregano or 1 Tablespoon dried oregano

1/2 cup red wine vinegar

1 cup extra virgin olive oil

Salt, pepper, crushed red pepper to taste

Prep the ingredients, combine, and let rest for 2-3 hours to meld flavors.

The following is a download for Chimichurri

ChimichurriDownload

Honestly, we were happy to just dip crackers and chips into this stuff. When it garnished the slices of grilled flank steak … we were in heaven.

Leave a comment about how you use chimichurri – I’m just looking for an excuse to make some more!

In health –

Deidre

Update:

The caregiver conference last week in Delaware was a rousing success! Attendees were very appreciative, both of my keynote and the afternoon workshop, where we practiced many effective techniques to re-balance and rejuvenate.

Once the videos are edited and available through Easterseals, I will let you know. So many services were featured in the hallways and around the conference room. From facilities, finances, and understanding Medicare/Medicaid to adaptive clothing, feeding utensils, and robotic assistive devices – caregivers do have resources available to them.

If you or someone you know is a caregiver, please let them know their local Easterseals can give them a wealth of information and guidance, no matter what their need.

The Deidreedwards.com website is being wrapped up and tested as I write this. Toolkit for Caregivers third edition is LIVE as a Kindle book, paperback with B&W interior, and the full-color paperback is available, but not directly linked to the others – I am working on getting that detail corrected.

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Heck, Yeah!

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We begin with a quote from Positive Psychology:

“Life is too short to spend time on things that don’t fit our values. When considering whether to commit to something, we typically ask ourselves, ‘Do I have enough time for this?‘ or ‘Will I enjoy it?‘ etc. But we should consider a more important question first: Which of my values does this align with?”

We pat ourselves on the back if we succeed in not over-committing our time.  Learning to balance personal energy is essential; but, adding to our plate just because we have time is not enough, is it?

Committing to a new action, without considering if it reflects our values, will ultimately undermine our wellbeing. Feelings of being inauthentic conflict with our sense of being true to ourselves.

Here’s a gentle reminder that by saying, “no way” to options that do not align with our values is an empowering action to take – while remaining on the lookout for something to which our very essence will scream, “Heck yeah, let’s do this!”

Something to which I gave a resounding, “heck yeah,” was choosing to speak at an annual caregiver conference.  

This has been an all-consuming endeavor that has taken four months to bring to fruition – on top of getting my website redesigned, and Toolkit for Caregivers third edition published. (More later about that).

As you read this, tomorrow I will be giving both a keynote, “You’re a Caregiver: Give Yourself a Hand!” and a workshop, “Mindfulness and Relaxation at Your Fingertips.”

Listeners, both in person and online, will experience a validation of their life-changing efforts in caregiving for a loved one, and will walk away with tools to empower themselves to become more resilient by bolstering their self-care and well-being.

There have been many activities to which I have said, “no thanks,” to of late because, not only was there not enough time, but also, they did not align with my personal values – even if they were touted as being a fun, social event.

Okay. Now, to the elephant in the room.

Success has come to the Kindle version of Toolkit for Caregivers and remains on special for $1.99. Thank you to everyone who has shared its availability with others!

There’s a glitch with Amazon, however, concerning both paperback versions. This reversal was totally unexpected, and involves behind the scenes things that I hope can be straightened out this week.

Sigh.

We’re working on it.

So, until you see a book cover on the print version that looks like the Kindle version, they are not the same. Green is good; blue is old.  

The website is inching closer to completion.

Sigh.

This little grasshopper is learning to be patient and to control only the things over which I have control … even if there is a whole lot of sighing around here.

Right now, there’s practice to be done for tomorrow’s presentations.

What are your values? Here’s a blast from the past as Sheree shares a download of a handy values list. Check it out to find your top five or ten personal values to which you may measure your activities to check for alignment.

Personal-Values-ListDownload

In health –

Deidre

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Blogging for good health!, Stress Reduction, This -n- That

Surprise From The Stork!

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When you work so hard for something and you are faced with so many delays, and patience is being tried like never before – there are tears of frustration and trembling of anger barely controlled – then that sweet moment comes when you can see a path to success.

With critical elements still hanging in the balance of uncertain completion, I turned to my calendar to see when the next possible date would be to publish my book.

August 20. Today, as you read this, but in the future as I write this – in faith.

My birthday month. A day that is 2+0 which is personally significant. I’m claiming it.

Please join me in welcoming to the world the third edition of Toolkit for Caregivers.

We had anticipated twins – the new edition and the new website – but the stork had something else in mind. Like many babies, their moment of birth is not always as anticipated.

I could not bear another delay in getting this beautiful Third Edition of Toolkit for Caregivers into the hands of those who need it; so, we developed a way to birth the book today while leaving the website in the oven a bit longer.

I would be so grateful for your help in making Toolkit for Caregivers more visible for potential readers on Amazon by increasing its ratings. Please consider getting the Kindle version – on sale for a limited time at $1.99 – and leave a verified purchase review. I know Sheree will have links in this post that will take you to Amazon.

Star reviews are wonderful – adding a brief, honest written review would be stupendous!

You don’t have to read every word right away; I know you are busy. You can scroll through to read a bit here and there, and I am sharing a quick two-page, chapter-by-chapter synopsis below, you can look at to better understand the scope of the book before leaving a review.

There are three versions of this new edition: Kindle, paperback, and paperback with full-color interior. Up at the top of the sales page on Amazon, in blue letters is “See all formats and editions.” (Check beside the star ratings). That link will take you to the full-color option for the paperback, as well as all other options.

Our editor, Sheree, just shared with me how a mutual friend, who just lost her husband, used one of the free downloads, The Business Side of Dying Checklist, to take the natural overwhelming emotions and confusion away as she went about taking care of needed family business. She was lost trying to figure out how to even get started; but, with the help of the checklist, she had finished in a couple of days!

Access for these free materials, as well as the new Caregiver Toolkit Bundle – which will assist caregivers with organization, self-care, and creating balance in their lives – is, therefore, also delayed a bit due to the redesign process of my website.

Fear not! All readers need to do is leave their email contact information on my site and I will let you know the moment the new site and materials are accessible for download.

Please check out my new baby and let me know what you think!

In health and proud as a new parent – yet still awaiting on the other baby –

Deidre

A FREE PREVIEW FOR YOU FROM TOOLKIT FOR CAREGIVERS!

Synopsis by Chapters for Toolkit for Caregivers

by Deidre Edwards, RN

Part 1 – Toolkit for Caregivers, Tips, Skills, and Wisdom to Maximize Your Time Together

Chapter 1 – Physical Environment – guides the reader on how to incorporate the home hospital bed into their house, listing various aspects to consider when placing it: privacy, accessibility, what the patient will be looking at, and more. Insider tips are given for adding layers to the bed for comfort and safety, and for caregiver ease of use.

From hacks using pool noodles to trick out the bed, to unique combinations for barrier cream, to options for urination and bowel movements, all common patient care concerns are covered – all aimed to optimize patient comfort and ease of care for the family caregiver.

Chapter 2 – Infection Control – covers the essentials for preventing the spread of infection. Step-by-step skills in hand washing techniques and wearing and taking off disposable gloves are clearly laid out. Suggestions for additional personal protective equipment are shared.

Chapter 3 – Process for Patient Care – even if the family caregiver has supplemental help, chances are there will be times when personal care will have to be given to the patient. No worries! All the basic skills of patient care are explained step-by-step so anyone can understand. Free downloads are available to print so readers can have the skill at their fingertips. From how to move the patient in the bed, changing sheets while the patient is in the bed, brushing teeth, complete bed bath, nail care, feeding, to how to modify clothing for the bedfast patient – it’s all there, and more.

Chapter 4 – Processes for you, the Caregiver – highlights: the extreme importance of self-care, how to simplify organization of keeping track of both the changing patient conditions and supplemental caregiver coverage through using calendars. Ideas for prioritizing self-care are given.

Chapter 5 – Processes for Home Visits – describes the roles of various health care providers who may visit the home: nurses, aides, social workers, physical and occupational therapists, and chaplains. How the calendar method of tracking the loved one’s changes simplifies these home visits is described.

Chapter 6 – Bring the Party Home – describes how various examples of home activities for the loved one and the family caregiver can contribute to meaningful experiences and help alleviate stress for all.

Chapter 7 – Odds and Ends – covers a variety of common issues: DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) documents, how to handle an approaching major weather event, to “inappropriately twinkling” eyes.

The Caregiver Toolkit Bundle is offered in a link to the author’s website that contains resources for caregiver mindfulness, self-care, audio affirmations, In this Moment of Quiet adult coloring workbook, and customizable templates for calendars, and record keeping templates for medications.

Part 2 – (Bonus Book) Love Lives Here – Toolkit for Caregiver Survival, for Before, During, and After

Chapter 1 – Love Is – a reminder that the mindset for caregiving is based on love, and because of love, there is a natural desire for mutual preparedness.

Chapter 2 – Before There is a Need – emphasizes that the need for preparing for future transitions in life/health/death come to us all. Avoiding taking preparations does not reflect love because those who are left behind, or who must become caregivers, are traumatized by a lack of having a plan in place. Tips on starting The Conversation are shared along with items that should be discussed and understood by all: Advanced Directives, organ donor issues, Legal and Medical Power of Attorney, Last Will and Testament, funeral plans, finances with right of survivorship/beneficiary, location of important papers, and more. Link to free download: Talking Points for The Conversation which expands on this material.

Chapter 3 – During the Caregiving Time – provides additional insights into caregiver self-care needs and solutions for meeting them. The normal emotional responses to caregiving are identified and ways to grapple with the confusing swirl of emotions are shared. Activities for their loved one are described along with ideas for having special one-on-one conversations. Ideas are mapped out for further preparations if their loved one’s condition is terminal.

Chapter 4 – A Time of Transition – things to look for if their loved one is terminal. Approaches to end-of-life issues, why their loved one may be hanging on, and potential needs during transition are shared including the last breath which may be missed by the family.

Chapter 5 – After – prepares readers for their initial response to their loved one’s passing and how to use the love they shared to keep them going.

Chapter 6 – The Business Side of Dying – right when everything hurts the worst and being left to grieve may be desired, the real world presents the newly grieved with business affairs. This chapter walks the reader through where they need to go first and what to do, along with identifying and supporting their first emotions of grief. How to handle thank you notes is discussed. Link to free download: The Business Side of Dying Checklist for the reader to follow and personalize as needed.

Chapter 7 – Grief – while each grief experience is unique, readers are given insider tips on what to expect. They have gone from the anticipatory grief they felt as a caregiver to real end-of-a-life grief. Waves of emotions will come, some expected, and others not expected. Ideas of how to get through the firsts are shared for birthdays, anniversaries, etc. Mindsets that will facilitate healing are shared that might assist them on a path of personal self-growth while still embracing and understanding their love and grief.

Chapter 8 – Learning to See the World with a New Focus – Never diminishing the enormity of being left with empty arms, readers are reminded that their living and healing depends upon helping themselves. They can come to understand that “Living our lives today does not dishonor those who no longer live here with us.”

Blogging for good health!

Fly Like An Eagle – For A Healthier You!

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Tired of planks?

I do love my planks, but anything can get monotonous.

If you are looking for something else to spice up those daily planks, this might just do the trick.

A bit less challenging than a plank, this move works with the core muscles and challenges maintaining stability in a different way.

Get on all fours with palms under your shoulders and knees under your hips. Extend one arm and the opposite leg at the same time for a count of eight. Bring the arm and leg back to the floor and repeat for the opposite arm and leg.

It can give you a bit of a challenge steadying everything, but that’s why this move is so good at strengthening the core. Plus, it can be humorous watching yourself finding opposite arms and legs!

Called the “bird dog,” this exercise helps stretch the length of the body and helps activate shoulders that might have been hunching while you sit.

I like to couple this with, “flying like an eagle,” I will be teaching in a presentation, “Mindfulness and Relaxation at Your Fingertips,” later this month for caregivers.

Here’s a great, easy exercise that effectively opens the upper chest:

            Fly like an eagle –

Sand with feet shoulder width apart, arms out straight to the side, palms always facing up, do not drop arms. Stop if you encounter pain.

“Flap” by lowering and raising your outstretched arms 4 to 8 times each: one third/two thirds/all the way to your side.

Followed by arm circles forward/backward 4 to 8 times in each direction: small/medium/large circles

The trick is in keeping your palms facing the ceiling. In doing so, you feel a stretch and an opening of your upper chest, resulting in your shoulders being less rounded.

Top this off with a power pose for two minutes, and you will be ready to conquer the world!

In health –

Deidre

Blogging for good health!, Stress Reduction, This -n- That

The Silence of Youth Caregivers

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Hidden

There is an estimated 5.4 million of them in America alone. You see them every day, yet you do not know who they are or, really, that they even exist to any great degree.

These people are losing their youth, their chance to grow and excel, their chance to form relationships with their peers, and their path to the future is shrouded in the mists of uncertainty and missed opportunities.

They have no voice – at least, until recently.

We at foodtalk4you want to add to the conversation to try and increase awareness – not only of their struggle – but to edify the rest of America and the world that there’s work to be done to help these people.

Who are they that are sacrificing so much in the name of family love?

Children and youth who are primary caregivers for family members.

Whether it springs from multi-generational households extending normal familial love – to loved ones in need or single parent homes struck with adult disability or disease – legions of children and youth are caught up in a process robbing them of the precious years to be a kid.

Can you imagine the fatigue and weight of responsibility experienced as an adult caregiver being shouldered by a fifth or sixth grader trying to gain skills in basic reading, writing, and math concepts?

How about a sleep-deprived and emotionally distracted caregiving teen trying to grasp the basics of Earth Science or Algebra II?

Opportunities for playing outdoors, being in group sports, going to or having parties, being a part of after school activities and sports – all pass these children and youth by.

Opportunities that will never come again.

All because they can’t leave the side of their physically and/or psychologically challenged family members who need these angel caregivers for their survival.

You can click on this link for more information.

There you can scroll through to read short articles, links to features on the Today Show, and more.

The goal is to 1) create awareness, 2) create advocates for change, and 3) to be a part of that change.

You may be living next door to a child/youth caregiver and not know it. Could you help out?

Are you involved in education? Can you be a part of identifying these young caregivers and guiding them to the assistive resources available in your community?

Are you in medicine? Do you know who is the primary caregiver of your patients? Can you assist them in finding help?

As voters, we can ALL start conversations with our representatives to bring the plight of caregiving children and youth to the forefront of policy changes.

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In health –

Deidre

Blogging for good health!, Habit Building, Stress Reduction, This -n- That

Namaste

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A wonderful thing happened while plowing through accumulated emails at the start of my writing workday.

Chris Kresser’s Friday newsletter held a gem for me that I can’t wait to share with you. Chris is deeply involved in functional medicine, and it’s always a delight to learn from him.

Today, he shared a link to Tara Brach’s guiding her YouTube viewers through a 19-minute meditation that eased me into a higher realm of calm than I had experienced for a long time.

This calmer state is helping me handle the slowdowns and uncertainties I spoke of last week, while still gracefully moving forward with what I can control.

It’s been a long time since I last attended a yoga class that would allow me to extend the deep sense of calm I gained today — all the way through to my very muscles – but following along with her video put an inner calm within reach, right in my home office.

If self-compassion is something you are seeking to bolster, Tara leads another shorter, guided meditation called, The RAIN of Self Compassion that may assist you. 

She concludes that video with a quote from Bapuji, an Indian master who said:

“My beloved child, break your heart no longer. Each time you judge yourself, you break your own heart. You stop feeding on the love which is the wellspring of your vitality. The time has come – your time to live, to celebrate, and see the goodness that you are. Let no one, no thing, no idea, or ideal obstruct you. If one comes, even in the name of truth, forgive it for its unknowing. Do not fight – let go and breathe into the goodness that you are.”

It’s short and sweet today in hopes that you will take a few minutes to lift and love yourself by following one or both guided meditations.

As always, if you found today’s post of value to you, share the goodness with others using the options under the MORE button below.

In health –

Deidre

Blogging for good health!, Habit Building, Stress Reduction, Titles Worth Reading

Delay is Not Denial

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Patience, grasshopper!

By the time you read this, it’s quite possible I will have an exact publishing date for the third edition of my Toolkit for Caregivers!

I only wish the date this instant.

This has been, what … over a year in the making – maybe longer? Don’t remind me.

Personal slowdowns, coupled with glacially slow turnaround times with those helping me have challenged my desires for, “do it right now”! Slowdowns have been my personal gadfly – needling and buzzing around me – a constant reminder there is a timing and a rhythm beyond my control.

But you know what?

Those slowdowns have helped me produce a better product for readers with offerings of more helpful materials to access – all to reach and support family caregivers everywhere.

The book launch is coinciding with a redesigned sales page on Amazon and a brand-new business website I haven’t even seen yet. So many moving parts, but all for a good cause.

This leads to a life lesson I want to share with you, plus a request for you to consider.

Life lesson:

Delay is not denial. Ofttimes, the circumstances improve because of the delay.

Case in point, I was encouraged to not replace my car right away, to take my time and consider all the options. With a bit of a pouting attitude – because I wanted a particular car right now! I waited and looked at other options and got opinions from others.

When I got a text alert yesterday that the car dealership was offering a tremendous incentive to buyers that would help make my (delayed) purchase so much better, I thanked my lucky stars I had not purchased it a month ago.

When faced with delays, I remind myself there’s still something to learn, do, or prepare for.

Request for you:

The publishers and I are moving the new edition of Toolkit for Caregivers into the already existing slot of its current edition, so the reviews will not be lost. But – new reviews and sales are crucial to put Toolkit for Caregivers in view of potential readers.

This is how you can help. Whether you have purchased the previous edition or not, the eBook will be on a $.99 special for a few days during the launch. You can help by doing one or all of these:

1) Get it for $.99.

2) Leave a star review.

3) Leave a brief, honest, written review.

I will be posting links and more information for you here next week. There will be a one-page synopsis available to you, if you do not have time to read the book right away.

The eBook will have a full-color interior; and the paperback will, initially, be available with a black and white interior.

My dream edition with a full-color interior will be forthcoming. It’s a complicated process, but it will happen.

Patience, grasshopper.

In health and with deep appreciation for your support,

Deidre

PS: Every week, requests for Toolkit for Caregiver Emotions reach me. Rest assured; I am working on getting that manuscript to the editors as soon as possible.

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Still Grateful and Breathing

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Remember my previous post about various breathing techniques, including Box Breathing and Emptying Breath?

Last week while scrolling through an author platform, I discovered an interesting book that called to me like sirens out of the deep. Written by a neonatologist, Edgar Reynoso Vanderhorst, MD, this book was about a holistic approach to health that included breathing techniques, and even tied into last week’s gratitude post featuring David Steindl-Rast.

In Wellness: Optimizing Yourself,  Dr. Vanderhorst mirrors Steindl-Rast in seeing the link of regular personal habits of gratitude to creating a more compassionate world.

How does this all tie together?

As I have written here before, positive thinking not only changes the hormonal chemistry of our bodies, but also influences the very structure and receptivity of our cells to positivity.

To paraphrase Steindl-Rast, gratitude comes from a place of satisfaction and a feeling of ‘enough’ rather than from a reminders of scarcity. Being grateful extends to better social connections that include respect and wanting the best for others.

Putting these together, we can see that transforming our own peace naturally leads to uplifting our interactions and concerns for others.

Dr. Vanderhorst has graciously agreed to share his thoughts with us on one aspect of wellness to combat the pull to our increasing stress response to today’s world.

His message to foodtalk4you readers:

“By incorporating simple breath practices, we can stabilize our minds, cultivate calmness and access our innate ability to choose how we respond to the world.

Physiology tells us, activating our parasympathetic nervous system reduces heart rate, oxygen consumption, and cortisol levels – a state described as calmness, which is what happens when we meditate.

Achieving this state can be simple. I developed a technique for myself that I implement daily to increase my awareness of the present moment that helps me navigate daily chaos in a more controlled way. I call this technique, “The Vanhorst Technique,” (meditation technique), which consists of simply taking a deep 4-second inhale, holding for 2 seconds, followed by a slow 6-second exhale, and holding for 2 seconds, repeating this cycle five times and working up to 10 minutes.

I usually practice this technique in the morning while lying in bed or when I’m in an emergency that requires my focused attention.”

Just yesterday, we witnessed horrible images of violence taking place at a political rally in America. Clearly, we need to have calming techniques ready to always use.

We can light only one candle to give light to a dark world, dear readers, and that’s our own.

Calming down with a breathing technique and staying in the moment to find what we are grateful for – even in an unpleasant situation – can help brighten our inner candle and set us up for a mindset that creates a listening ear, a reasoning mind, and helps us appreciate differences in the people around us.

In health – Deidre

Let me know in the comments below how you use breathing and reminders of gratitude to reframe your inner self.

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Stop. Look. Go!

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Our parents’ simple, sage advice may well be the secret to life!

In his TED Talk, David Steindl-Rast presents the ultimate brief on happiness, and how living gratefully is the key to any circumstance.

With over 9 million views, his less than 15-minute talk represents a paradigm shift that transforms personal happiness – and, ultimately, world peace!

It all started with my quest to learn more about his quote:

“It is not happiness that makes us grateful,

but gratefulness that makes us happy.”

Ever notice how some people carrying the weight of the world can often seem to be the most content, while others who have food, shelter, and good health seem to be burdened and unhappy?

What’s up with that?

Could be gratitude.

It’s a chicken and the egg kind of thing. Which comes first?

Listen to David Steindl-Rast to learn how happiness does not come before gratefulness. It’s the other way around.

The “secret sauce” is in his simple formula of:

Stop

Look

Go

Stop the merry-go-round to be in the present moment. Is that hard to do? Sometimes I instruct myself with an audible, “STOP!”

Then, look around, and be open in your senses – absorb the sight, sound, smell, taste, and feel of the moment and enjoy the good that you can find.

Be open in your heart to the opportunity of that moment for you. Sometimes that opportunity is something difficult, very difficult, but it’s an opportunity for you to grow.

The final step is simply – go.

Take the life opportunity of that present moment and go forth to really do something.

The last five minutes of his message is pivotal for both personal and world happiness, starting with:

“…if you are grateful, you are not fearful, and if you’re not fearful, you are not violent.”

I want to quote his entire summary.

I want to make a poster of it to read and internalize every day.

If you are looking for a positive word, something to start a dialogue, or the path for your next step, take a few minutes to listen to his message.

In health and filled with gratitude –

Deidre

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