Patience, grasshopper!

By the time you read this, it’s quite possible I will have an exact publishing date for the third edition of my Toolkit for Caregivers!

I only wish the date this instant.

This has been, what … over a year in the making – maybe longer? Don’t remind me.

Personal slowdowns, coupled with glacially slow turnaround times with those helping me have challenged my desires for, “do it right now”! Slowdowns have been my personal gadfly – needling and buzzing around me – a constant reminder there is a timing and a rhythm beyond my control.

But you know what?

Those slowdowns have helped me produce a better product for readers with offerings of more helpful materials to access – all to reach and support family caregivers everywhere.

The book launch is coinciding with a redesigned sales page on Amazon and a brand-new business website I haven’t even seen yet. So many moving parts, but all for a good cause.

This leads to a life lesson I want to share with you, plus a request for you to consider.

Life lesson:

Delay is not denial. Ofttimes, the circumstances improve because of the delay.

Case in point, I was encouraged to not replace my car right away, to take my time and consider all the options. With a bit of a pouting attitude – because I wanted a particular car right now! I waited and looked at other options and got opinions from others.

When I got a text alert yesterday that the car dealership was offering a tremendous incentive to buyers that would help make my (delayed) purchase so much better, I thanked my lucky stars I had not purchased it a month ago.

When faced with delays, I remind myself there’s still something to learn, do, or prepare for.

Request for you:

The publishers and I are moving the new edition of Toolkit for Caregivers into the already existing slot of its current edition, so the reviews will not be lost. But – new reviews and sales are crucial to put Toolkit for Caregivers in view of potential readers.

This is how you can help. Whether you have purchased the previous edition or not, the eBook will be on a $.99 special for a few days during the launch. You can help by doing one or all of these:

1) Get it for $.99.

2) Leave a star review.

3) Leave a brief, honest, written review.

I will be posting links and more information for you here next week. There will be a one-page synopsis available to you, if you do not have time to read the book right away.

The eBook will have a full-color interior; and the paperback will, initially, be available with a black and white interior.

My dream edition with a full-color interior will be forthcoming. It’s a complicated process, but it will happen.

Patience, grasshopper.

In health and with deep appreciation for your support,

Deidre

PS: Every week, requests for Toolkit for Caregiver Emotions reach me. Rest assured; I am working on getting that manuscript to the editors as soon as possible.

Don’t you love it when someone shares a book title with you, thinking you may love it as well? I am much more motivated to get a book based upon personal testimony. And what if you get to meet the author himself to get an inside glimpse of why he wrote it?

That’s what we’ve got today!

Barrett Huang just released a new workbook whose title caught my eye, DBT Workbook For Emotional Eating: Stop Compulsive Overeating and Quit Your Food Addiction with Proven Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills for Men and Women.

This DBT term was new to me. Most of us have heard about Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), and if you have attended a therapy session, chances are it was based on the precepts of CBT, which focuses on changing problematic thinking. Among other things, this newer therapy, DBT, is best known for its success with eating disorders.

Mission Harbor Behavioral Therapy

After reading the sample, I was sold on purchasing this helpful guide. Our philosophies of starting with how we think about ourselves and how we perceive our circumstances were perfectly aligned. Was I a proponent of DBT without knowing it?

There was something else that lit up memories in my mind as I read about his approach to achieving a healthier lifestyle – it reminded me of Noom.

I used Noom a few years ago as an accountability buddy for losing the weight I had gained as a caregiver – even those who write about health sometimes need a helping hand. Many of my approaches and exercises felt familiar and brought back the sense of calm control I had over my eating through my previous training.

According to this review, Noon Diet Review, Noom does use DBT.

One thing I did not have with Noom, was a workbook. I love having a workbook component to my learning, and Barrett Huang’s latest book checks off all the boxes for building personal skills and mindsets.

He reveals his approach to weight loss and overall health through telling his own story and progresses to the evolution of his successful methods. I could see the familiar patterns with his weight loss struggle, reflected in so many people I know or have met.

So inspired by his workbook, I reached out to Barrett Huang, and he quickly accepted my invitation to share a little bit extra with foodtalk4you readers. He writes:

“I like that Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) focuses on accepting your thoughts, feelings, and actions while also striving to improve them. Many therapies tend to place excessive emphasis on fixing issues rather than taking a step back and accepting things as they are.

DBT can be applied to various aspects beyond just emotional eating, including anxiety, depression, and BPD, to name a few. Emotional eating often serves as a coping mechanism to deal with uncomfortable emotions.

Some of the skills DBT teaches include:

Mindfulness: This helps you develop greater mindfulness and presence in the moment. You learn to appreciate the things you have and avoid getting caught in a cycle of overthinking.

Distress tolerance: You learn effective ways to cope with uncomfortable emotions and situations without resorting to impulsive behaviors that could be harmful.

Emotion Regulation: This skill focuses on understanding and managing your emotions more effectively. You learn how to label and handle your emotions, identify triggers, and employ coping techniques.

Interpersonal Effectiveness: A significant aspect, this skill helps you enhance your communication and relationship-building abilities. It involves expressing your boundaries, feelings, thoughts and needs to others.

Hence, DBT offers a balanced approach by addressing both acceptance and change, rather than focusing solely on one aspect. Additionally, I find DBT to be highly adaptable and capable of being tailored to various situations. Ultimately, you acquire the tools to become a more resilient and adaptable individual, capable of navigating life’s challenges.

I aimed to create a DBT workbook that is not only easy to follow and implement but also interactive. This workbook is crafted with personal stories and practical worksheets and exercises. Its approach is designed to assist readers in transforming their relationship with food for the better. Drawing from impactful personal anecdotes and incorporating well-established DBT lessons for emotional well-being and stress management, this workbook provides the tools needed to embark on a journey of lasting change.”

If this sounds like something that would help you or someone you know, please check out his book using the links provided. You can discover more about Barrett Huang and his many other books, mostly aimed at helping children and adults using DBT, by going to his website.

In health –

Deidre

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Recency is the bedrock for remembering – that which is recent, is easiest to remember.

Amit Sood’s uplifting post, Resilient Option, got me to thinking. He used the word ‘recency’ in teaching his lesson aimed at building personal resilience. In his Day 24 insight for Week 4, he reminds listeners that trees don’t grow deep roots during the storm.

We must concentrate on building ourselves up each day – not just when we might need the results.

He cited studies proving that students who employed daily reminders of personal values, reflected honesty in their behaviors better than a group of students who completed an intensive course on integrity a few months ago.

To start a daily habit of building positivity and resilience, he recommended journaling about three core values in our personal and professional lives. Brilliant! This concept ties into my post for June 20, 2023, (<click), in which I introduce the concept of reading a personal intention statement at the start of each day.

This daily practice has been a game changer for me – augmenting every good mindset I give myself. Maybe some of the ideas in my intention statement are not 100% fulfilled, but I BELIEVE them all, and I see how each intention is coming into focus more and more.

Maybe we have not made up with someone over a recent disagreement; but saying, “I seek peace with everyone I am blessed to meet,” is just the message needed to move us toward harmony with other people.

Our mind believes what we tell it!

Perhaps we struggle with eating food that is not healthful, but a daily reminder that, “I am grateful for my life and health. I am learning how to honor my body by eating the kind of food that helps it,” will nudge us toward food that gets us to that goal.

To assist you in either journaling about your core values or in creating that daily reminder through a spoken intention, we are including a handy download of Core Values that can be the springboard for your self-nourishing message.

Download Core Values below:

In health –

Deidre

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Last week, I mentioned our good news about Toolkit for Caregiver Emotions, being available for pre-order on Amazon, and it occurred to me it might be nice to share a snippet of that book with you today.  

Here is the first part of Chapter 2, where I introduce readers to the first technique we do as an exercise that: 

1) Assists people in understanding how much control they have over their emotions  

2) How to create an accepting mindset and environment for emotions, and  

3) How to, at least temporarily, let it go.  

I am also introducing caregivers to the idea that they count. Their total health is a valid focus that needs to be recognized, so they can successfully be there for their loved one/patient.  

Here is your peek inside of Toolkit for Caregiver Emotions: 

Chapter 2 

Are you drowning? 

We caregivers of loved ones often think we should just soldier on in silence. Don’t complain. Don’t reach out for help. Just do the job. Any feelings we experience about ourselves are pushed so far down they are out of sight. 

Our loved one comes first, last, and everywhere in between.  

That philosophy may work for a while … until it clearly does not. 

I can tell when it’s not working. Caregivers come to talk to me with that glazed-over, shell-shocked look, like they are drowning at sea and are going down for the third time – lacking the energy to even signal for help. 

A greater understanding of the unique caregiver emotional situation will assist you in smoother transitions through the phases of caring – and even grieving. 

I thought I had everything figured out when I started caring for my dear husband. I was a nurse who taught Certified Nursing Assistants, after all. 

Little did I know, there was still much to learn – especially about my emotional and physical needs during that blessed time of caring for him. 

You see, in a caregiving situation, there are two patients. Two patients with equally important, but very different needs. Two patients whose needs are intertwined and dependent upon each other.  

Those patients are you, the caregiver; and the loved one you are caring for. Ignore the needs and welfare of the one, and the other will not be cared for.  

I want to shine a light on the unpredictable roller coaster of often surprising and negative caregiver emotions.  

Emotions are what make us human. When we cry, we’re experiencing emotion. Whenever we are happy, sad, mad, passionate, upset – those are all emotions. 

But sometimes, negative emotions need to be reined in!  

Emotions can steal our involvement and enjoyment of the present moment. 

You see, emotions should just come and go. But sometimes, we get so uncontrollably wrapped up in our feelings, we start identifying with them.  

This is what I know – we are not our emotions; and we can – and should – control them at times. But how?  

Keep reading and follow along with the techniques I share. 

• Copyright 2022, Deidre Edwards 

Oh, I just hope you are wanting to turn the page to read what’s next!  

And you will get to do that. My goal is to beat my deadline of August 2^nd by publishing early!  

Foodtalk4you subscribers can assist us in getting this book into the hands of the over 50 million caregivers – in America alone – by joining the launch team. Very soon, we will send out information on how you can get an inside look at a book and participate in its success.  

There will be opportunities for getting FREE autographed copies for launch participants. Yay! 

UPDATE!!

Dear Readers – It’s a humble little burnt orange banner, but it means so very much:

“#1 New Release in (the category of)  Physician and Patient Caregiving”

This means YOUR pre-orders for Toolkit for Caregiver Emotions are enabling others to see this book on Amazon so much easier! In the coming weeks, I’ll be dedicating myself to publishing before my projected date of August 2^nd because more and more caregivers need this message of hope, understanding, and techniques.

A change in our health status can come in the blink of an eye – not only do we need to be prepared for the physical tasks of caregiving, but we need the mental and emotional skills to stay sane, not feel alone, and to strengthen life-long resilience skills. The third title in my Caregiver Series will do that.

I just cannot say, “Thank You” enough! 

In the meantime, it’s time to get up from this desk, do a minute of planks, and go for a walk before the temperature decides to return to winter.  

Boing! That’s springtime in the Northern Hemisphere! 

Pssst! You have my permission to share this post using the options under the MORE button below. 😊 

In health –  

Deidre