It’s the bottom line.

Everything else can and will fall away. We are left with this one thing. All our striving, our busy activities, our concerns, our vain imaginings – they disappear, and we are left with this one eternal element that is the sum of the Universe.

LOVE.

We need love on a cellular level. Take love away and we become twisted and tortured.

Some of us have mistakenly believed we do not deserve love – we are somehow less than, or we have caused so much harm, that we do not merit love.

But we were designed by love – if only by the power of Universal, love found in the miracle of Creation itself – and were designed to need and give love.

I’ve discovered that love has a handmaiden.

Grief.

When we love someone, we are committing to the grief that will surely follow when that love is taken from our physical presence.

If you have lost someone, the grief you feel is a testament to your love! That’s a big deal.

It makes loving someone an even more precious thing. What a gift!

“I love you fiercely even knowing that when we are physically separated, I will grieve and hurt – BUT it’s totally worth it and I freely do it!”

Moreover, that love never dies.

We may not realize it until we lose someone, but love is so much bigger than the here and now. Love exists on so many planes and in so many realms that we can barely understand it.

I think our souls must be a bundle of love light that when we are no longer here to hold or be held, we whisk away to be love on another dimension – and that the love we were burns brightly in the hearts and minds of our loved ones.

Love is light. Light gives peace and hope – they are all wrapped up together.

In this season of love, may we freely give and receive the love, peace and hope that is the ultimate force of change to ourselves, to others, and to the world.

You may share this message of love by using the options in the MORE button below.

In health and love –

Deidre

Merry Christmas everyone!

Sometimes we just have to wait.

Our little ones are gearing up for a season of waiting as they bounce and wriggle with delight in anticipation, just thinking about presents and festive activities heading their way in the coming weeks.

We adults are the same about some things. While we have mastered waiting to open beautifully wrapped packages, there are other anticipations that tempt us, and we become impatient.

I’m feeling a bit frustrated with waiting right now.

You see, there’s a big project that I’ve been working on for months that was going to be revealed to you this very day, but some of the many moving parts of this multifaceted project are just not in place yet.

So, we wait.

The deadline was self-imposed. It will come together – when it’s ready – and the big reveal will be well done and helpful to those who need it.

A recent message from the daily thoughts I subscribe to by Amit Sood, focused on Gaining vs. Becoming, and has helped me gain patience in my delayed project.

His message urged listeners to consider the difference between gaining vs. becoming as they approached their life goals.

Some people focus on gaining wealth, position, or possessions at all costs as they go about their careers, whereas others focus on the kind of person they want to become while doing their work.

Sure, we all need to pay the rent and buy groceries, but what kind of person are we becoming while we do the necessary work? Is our work requiring us to become less than our optimal self?

His thoughtful words reminded me of a saying about people remembering not what we say to them, but how they were made to feel while we spoke to them.

The first time I ever heard that saying, I certainly felt a pinch. From then on, I have tried to model being a more thoughtful, considerate, compassionate, and understanding person.

We can still get the job done while taking a path that includes honoring what kind of person we want to become.

No one is ever done becoming. Each of us can modify what we work on to become – at any age.

What is the kind of person you want to become?

What are you going to do to become that person?

Take a moment as we anticipate the holidays. Light a candle. Bundle up and step outdoors to gaze at the stars. When all is said and done, what counts?

Become that.

And if you are impatient to get the results of last week’s word search puzzle, you can relax, because the results are posted under this!

If you found this helpful, share with a friend using the options under the MORE button below.

In health with gratitude and thanks to each of our readers –

Deidre

We at foodtalk4you have always promoted improved health – one meal, one breath, one movement at a time.

Yep. There it is on our beautiful banner.

Lately, we’ve been hovering around the mental concepts of boosting our health. Maybe we could say mental/emotional/spiritual concepts.

But it’s all mental, really.

I used to think that our brain controlled everything, but have come to appreciate that the brain does not control things. We control the brain.

What the brain is allowed to send out, influences the outcomes we experience.

These past weeks, we explored a change in command as we recognize that – even if it’s totally new to us – we can purposefully say goodbye to the chains of the past so we can embrace the full potential of the present moment.

One goodbye release may not be enough; but over time, the more we can fully release our past hurts, disappointments, and traumas, the more we can feel that shift in power. We no longer allow the past to hold sway over our present.

This takes practice – along with the new belief that, “I am willing to change.”

Changing the habit of self-talk can take considerable mindfulness to recognize the subtleties of how ingrained our unsupportive and judgmental inner dialogue can be.

What’s the knee-jerk conversation you throw at yourself when you splash some coffee on the floor?

“You nimrod! What an idiot!”

Such a casual phrase, maybe meant to accept responsibility, is also heaped in judgement. Mess happens to all of us, dear readers. We all splash tumblers onto the floor, drop things, and stumble by simply tripping over our own feet – judgement is not needed. Maybe we need to be more careful, sure, but a stack of negative messages can grow over the course of time.

If our first thought is to be judgmental, we need to reflect on why we need judgment. Why do we think we deserve judgment? Because someone always judged us? That’s their message – an old message that we are giving life and power over us today.

Why don’t we forgive ourselves? Wouldn’t that be the kinder thing to do? Wouldn’t you like a little forgiveness?

As I dropped a jar of dill pickle relish on the floor a few days ago and watched half of its contents spatter all over the kitchen floor, I could have judged myself. Instead, there was a reminder to screw on the lid better next time and double check my efforts along with –

“Oops!”

“Man, I’m glad that wasn’t sweet pickle relish!”

“Hmmm, what’s the best way to clean this up?”

Do you groan and say you have to go to work … have to mow the grass …have to go to the store?

We need to do a word swap. Go from judgment to helpful. Go from negative to positive. Maybe just practice stating facts.

How about –

“I’m going to the store so we can have some yummy food to fix for dinner.”

“I choose to go to work so I can pay the rent.”

“I’m going to mow the grass before it rains.”

From the time we open our eyes in the morning until we close them at night, we are making choices. Practice using your power of choice as you actively guide your brain to set the tone of your day.

Be kind to yourself. Wouldn’t that feel good?

If you found this helpful, please share with someone you care about using the options in the MORE button below.

In health –

Deidre

Last week, we opened the idea of releasing the shackles of the past, with the goal of freeing ourselves to live in the present moment.

As each of us does this release, there is a feeling of new-found POWER. We are lighter, freer.

Heady stuff if you are new to it.

It is not new, though. We had the power all along, we just chose to give that power to the past. But no regrets or bitterness about wasting our lives – remember, we are going forward.

What’s important to remember is that you are in control of your mind.

You choose what to think. Feelings and emotions are thoughts. You hold total control over your thoughts.

Old ways of thinking may whisper and whine that you can’t change how you think – changing is hard.

Change is different, not impossible. When the voices of self-doubt ring out, acknowledge them, and release them – they are not needed by you.

Use any adage you want – maybe, the longest journey starts with a single step – but moment by moment, day by day, with consistent effort you can change anything. Step toward the marvelous vistas that await you.

Just believe that you are open to change within yourself – even if you do not know how this will happen or what it may look like right now.

“I am willing to change.”

Write it down. Say it out loud. Whisper it in a prayer. Leave sticky notes. In a private moment sitting in the sunshine, open your arms to the skies and repeat,

“I am willing to change.”

Send positive messages to yourself every day. If your previous internal monologues have always been negative, such positivity may seem forced. It doesn’t matter. Shower yourself with love, praise, acceptance, and repeat your willingness to be open to change.

Life all around you will respond with the positivity you have sent out to the Universe.

We get what we send out.

Chose to be a victorious, positive individual – not a victim of past mistreatment.

Go within to learn of your unique strengths, talents, and desires.

You have the power and the answers to your needs right now. Your inner guidance will lead you to the right resources and the right answers – lean into the positive flow within you.

Until next time –

Release the past with a blessing.

Commit to being willing to change.

Share these positive thoughts by using the MORE button below. By subscribing to Foodtalk4you.com, you will get notices each week of the new post.

In health –

Deidre

My healing Covid brain was as blank as the computer screen staring back at me.

New post? Meh.

After testing a rabbit hole about the veracity of the “man flu” theory – I was trying to rediscover an article from a few years back about how men may experience colds and flu differently than women – nothing jumped out at me as being particularly exciting.

The “man flu” thing was inconclusive. Apparently, women may get a stronger immune response at the onset of illness and more rapidly recover thanks to hormones. Estrogen seems to bolster immune response and testosterone dampens it. (menshealth.com, Dec. 12, 2017, Carolyn Crist)

No fireworks.

What does get me fired up is change.

We so often fight change at every turn, resisting new approaches, and relying upon the adage that personal change is impossible because, “That’s just the way I think/am/do” – “I can’t help it” – “I was brought up that way.”

What we cannot change is the past, and it’s the past that is often what’s holding us back from moving forward.

Traumatized? Abused? Lack of support?

We could all compile quite a list along with who was at fault. Perhaps we have memorized this list and revisit it every day, keeping the litany of past injuries and villains at the forefront of every thought.

Friends, we are robbing ourselves of living our present moment by holding on to the past.

Before we move forward, we must release the past.

“But he/she did me wrong!”

True enough.

How is reliving that trauma helping you now?

You can let it go. Yes, you can.

Our past has given us many lessons, required us to strengthen in ways we never imagined, and has equipped us to live in this moment – only if we allow ourselves to truly live and experience the new things.

The past must be released. Released with love and a blessing.

What?

“That stuff was bad … They were bad … There’s no love or blessing there!”

The love is for you. The blessing is for the strengthening lessons you learned along the way and for those who hurt you, that they may somehow come to know peace and move forward as well.

Do this:

Find an object you can wrap your fingers around. Cell phones and TV remotes work great; so do spoons, pens, or a marker.

Hold this object in your hand. Look at it. Get a good grip around it.

This object is symbolic of what you’re holding onto.

Hold it close to your chest because we tend to hold these things close to us, not wanting to let go.

Close your eyes and take a few slow breaths.

Thank this life lesson for what you have learned from it. It was traumatizing, yes, but you gained many life skills from this experience, and you are stronger for it.

Keep slow breathing as you consider the positive aspects gained from this trauma.

Ask yourself if you’d be willing to release this experience, letting go of the negative and those who were involved, while still retaining the positive for yourself.

If you agree to let it go – even if you don’t know exactly how you can do it – maybe you can just be willing at this point – then, as you open your eyes, bring your hand away from your chest.

Look at your grip loosen on the object. Bless once again the lessons learned and yourself, release the pain and those who caused it – blessing them as well.

Then, set the object down, releasing your hand’s connection to it.

Take another long, deep breath.

Maybe you are just going through the motions the first time you do this but keep at it each day. In time, your relationship with past traumas will shift.

My dog-eared, underlined copy of The Essential Louise Hay Collection continues to inspire. Next week, we’ll explore being willing to change.

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In health –

Deidre